Saturday, April 11, 2015

The Cute Wall (Volume Five)

Now, the moment of truth is time and it's been awhile since we got zapped by that pesky Excalibur but don't worry. Those flying aces have taken care of it because it's now time to do...THE CUTE WALL!



How great it is to have this segment back after a short break. Anyway, let's continue where we left off with...

Queen Delightful

...that's right! Queen Delightful from The 7D. Anyway, me and my pal trying to decide where should we put her on the Cute Wall until we got zapped by the Excalibur. Sheesh... I wonder what kind of d-day weapon's going to zap us next? Stonehenge? Chandelier? The Balaur? Anyway, never mind about that but what do you think about her?

(audience murmuring)

I tell you where to put it...

(audience laughing)

Well, well...Look who's decided to show up.

That's right. And before the risk of getting zapped by the Excalibur again, mind if you give me that?

(audience laughing)

Wait, why did you put it in CUTE. I was going to put it anyway before you showed up.

Time-efficient, eh?

(audience laughing)

So we don't wanna get zapped by Excalibur while arguing, right?

(Annoyed grunt) Okay, right. Next up...

Axew

Hold on. Is that Iris's Axew from the Pokemon Black and White anime?

Sure is.

Before you put it, let me just say something about this, right?

Oh my gas...

You know any idea why I don't see any girl in the convention dressed as BW's Iris?

Maybe that's because they didn't see the Pokemon Black and White anime a few years ago.

(audience laughing)

Precisely. I don't see any Iris cosplays today. When I see people dressed as their Pokemon BW characters, why there are some girls dressed as those female main characters that never appeared on the BW anime. Why do they dressed as those main girls not in the anime rather than Iris? Here's a top tip: DRESS AS CHARACTERS APPEARED ON THE ANIME, NOT ON THE GAMES!

(audience laughing)

Okay. That's good call but can you tell me the girls that didn't appeared on the BW anime and featured Iris instead of either of them?

Hilda and Rosa

Oh. So your point is that you should tell any girl who dressed as their favorite Black and White character not to dress as either Hilda or Rosa and instead dressed as Iris because both Hilda and Rosa never appeared on the BW anime series. Are you implying that anime is definitely better than video games?!

(audience laughing)

Yes. And for those who are going to dress as Serena from Pokemon XY, follow the anime guidelines and stick to her new outfit just like you saw from the anime. Besides. I'm sick of every girl dressed in her old clothes, you know.

(audience laughing)

Okay. Enough of the public service nonsense. Anyway, where should we put Axew?

I'll tell you where to put Iris' favorite Dragon-type Pokemon. It's on the CUTE section!

(audience laughing)

Wow. You're starting to get more serious right now.

(audience laughing)

Yes. Again, time-saving measures in the hopes that we don't get zapped by Excalibur again.

(audience laughing)

Jibanyan

Who's that? I've never seen this kind of cute character.

That's Jibanyan from Yokai Watch. There was a video game, then they have an anime show on TV Tokyo, just like Pokemon. The kids love this show and they have an array of merchandise from the anime series, just like Pokemon.

And you're saying that Jibanyan is what Pikachu is to Pokemon, am I right?

Frankly, yes. Kids love this kind of yokai and they surely want a stuff toy of Jibanyan to cuddle with as well as that ghost named...

Whisper?

Yes. Whisper.

Whisper

Ugh...Why did they have to name this ghost from a sanitary napkin?

(audience laughing)

Okay, Whisper. Since you had a very gross name for a ghost like you, time for you to be put at...SERIOUSLY NOT CUTE!

(audience laughing)

That's it? You're putting Whisper at SERIOUSLY NOT CUTE?

It's a gross name. He got that name from a woman's napkin and that's disgusting!

(audience laughing)

Okay. I see what you got there but you know what? I should put Jibanyan in the...hey! What are you doing?!

I could just put it on NOT CUTE because he's a character I'm not particularly familiar of.

(audience laughing)

Oh come on!!! Huh?

It's floating?! Where's it going?

(audience laughing)

Ha! I believe Jibanyan wants to be in the CUTE side!

How did he...?

Because he's a Yokai! And that's what Yokais do!

(audience laughing, then applause)

Ugh. You win this round, Jibanyan. Hey, what about Whisper?

He's crying and accepting his fate that he had a terrible name.

(audience laughing)

Cottonee

AAAHHH!!! What's that?

Cottonee!

Cottonee?!

Cottonee!

Are you trying to bring your Pokemon friends at the CUTE WALL? What's this?

Oi! Don't mess with Cottonee because if you do, Cottonee's going to shoot you down.

Shoot me down with what?!

ENERGY BALL!!!

(Pew! Pew! Ka-boom!)

(audience laughing, then applause)

Ugh...This is much...more...worse than Excalibur...ugh....

Well, Cottonee, is it okay if you can be in the NAKAKAGIGIL spot? You have potential you know. Anyway, see you next time!

Time for the recap!

SERIOUSLY NOT CUTE:
Raichu
*Whisper

NOT CUTE:
Dopey
Kwazii

CUTE:
Pichu
Plusle
Minun
Pachirisu
Emolga
Dedenne
Mokona
Mog
Catbug
Bashful
Froakie
Fennekin
Harukasan
Stuffy
Tunip the Vegimal
Minccino
Piplup
Sylveon
*Queen Delightful
*Axew
*Jibanyan

NAKAKAGIGIL!!!:
Pikachu
BMO
Bijou
Poof
George
Happy
Chespin
Doc McStuffins
Mabel Pines
Sofia
*Cottonee

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