One of the most anticipated films of 2016 is none other than everyone's favorite "Merc with the Mouth" who is good to be bad at being the good guy. Enter Deadpool.
Sadly, I can't explain what's what about this film because Deadpool's here to explain what's what about his film because if I can explain about this myself Deadpool's going to blow my house down with some explosives rigged under my bed.
Hello! Privet! Namaste! Ahoj! Merhaba! Hola! Salut! Yia sou! Selam! Guten Tag! Ni Hao! Konnichiwa! Witaj! Shalom! Saluton! Annyeong! People of the world! Yes, it's me. The merc with the mouth they called me Deadpool and how it's great to have a movie about myself. If by myself, I mean REALLY. Myself.
If you don't know who I really am. Lemme tell you a story and don't worry, I won't put you to sleep like what your mama, papa, nana, and pepop do when you're little. Once upon a time, there was a mercenary named Wade Wilson and he was diagnosed with the little C-word that everyone's afraid to have one in their life, but then, a secret experiment lured Mr. Wilson to a choice to live a second chance or face his imminent death. However, the experiment didn't healed his cancer but gained mutant genes to regenerate himself. Wilson's cancer left him disfigured but incapable of death. This is where Deadpool is born. Yep. That's me! We're you surprised?
My good friend Ryan Reynolds did a great job of being me and to be honest, both Ryan and I can make a perfect combination because he's so good at being me in this film. Also, my other good friend, director Tim Miller, did a great job of perfecting a film about me everybody in the world would love. I just want to be with those guys for the rest of my life, if you know what I mean?
Some people heard about my film is a total wreck compared to those low-life Marvel films and I said I disagree because my film "kills" all of the other films from the Marvel universe! Avengers, Spider-Man, X-Men, Fantastic Four, Guardians of the Galaxy, you name every stuff from the Marvel universe and I can top them all thanks to my...um...what some might call fighting style as well as my charisma that pleases the viewers.
I want all of you, fellow supporters of me, Deadpool, to enjoy my film made by the people who knew better about me, the Merc with the Mouth, because this is why my dream of having a movie about me came true thanks to my new friends Ryan Reynolds and director Tim Miller and before you're getting all emotional, you'd better wipe off your tears with your bare hands. Got it?! Good.
P.S. Don't have a date for Valentines? Spend a date with me, Deadpool.
Thank you Deadpool for your rhetorical message and for that, I'll give you a 3.9 out of 5 on the rating scale. Happy now that you got your own film?!