Monday, September 9, 2013

Let's Do The News! (September 9, 2013)

(cheers and applause)

Jeremy: Excellent work! For the first time, there's someone who can outcute BMO!!!

Richard: Yeah, for the first time! As of now...

(audience laughing)

Jeremy: What do you mean "as of now?"

Richard: Because Poof is the seventh cartoon character to come on our segment and we have three more left on our segment. I already book the other two but the final character to compete on our segment is a bit of a wild card. It's a bit of a secret we can't tell you for now...

(audience laughing)

Jeremy: So, since Poof outcute BMO, Mokona, Catbug, and all of the other cute characters, will the last three ever to outcute Poof?

Richard: Well, hope so but I think it's the wild card who thinks he or she can outcute that fairy baby. Be sure to come back soon, okay? We only got three weeks left on this segment and hey! Any suggestions for our next round when we return this segment, feel free to suggest any cute characters! Just the cartoon or the anime or the video game ones okay?

(audience laughing)

James: Anyway, the news and hey! Big news! Word from the Olympic committee that the next city to succeed after the Rio 2016 Olympics is Tokyo, Japan!

Jeremy: Excellent!

(cheers and applause)

Richard: Wait, Tokyo, Japan is the hosting city for the next 2020 Olympics?!

James: That's right! Tokyo blitzes Istanbul and Madrid by a long shot, although I felt kinda sad to the Spaniards after their nation got eliminated from the bids. Pity though and since Spain's on the financial brink right now, there's no way that thing could happen. Well, here's a little bit of a trivia though.

Richard: James, are you sure you're fine with all of those DYKs and the trivias? We're kinda irritated by those...

(audience laughing)

James: Anyway, for a trivia, this isn't the first time Japan had hosted the Olympics because the first time they held the Summer Olympics was in 1964, which is the first Asian nation to host such an event. There was this show called Eagle Sam, which is about Sam the Eagle, the mascot of the 1984 Summer Olympics in LA and oh, the venue that was gonna used for the 2020 Tokyo Olympics was featured in the post-apocalyptic masterpiece by Katsuhiro Otomo, Akira. That's a bit of a trivia though.

Jeremy: Yeah, that's a bit of a trivia. Thank you but to be honest, apart from all the people from Tokyo cheering from the announcement that Tokyo's the host city for the 2020 Olympics, I have a few doubts for this one because, well, you know all of the Fukushima crisis and the strong yen and problems arising in Japan, not to mention the ever-shrinking population.

James: It's seven years away from now so, that will give Japan more time to think and hopefully, there shouldn't be another disaster that stands in their way. I have my fingers crossed that for the next seven years, Tokyo, Japan should prepare for the better and for worse while making changes as an Olympic city for 2020. Well, Vision 2020 right?

(audience laughing)

 Jeremy: Now, bad news. Earlier, I just heard from the Department of Energy that to address the power shortages in Luzon, they are considering about a one- or two-hour brownout in the peak hours of 11 a.m., 2p.m., and 7 p.m.

(huh)

Richard: Huh? One or two hour brownout in the peak hours? That's like...

Jeremy: I know. This is a bit messy just in case someone's a bit nosy right now but anyway, the DOE told that they are planning additional power plants but the finishing time is very too long, takes about two to three years to make it done so what they're planning to fill the gap is by power interruption and that's a load of rubbish. You see some power advisories flashing on the TV screens saying blah blah blah and then blah blah blah, why would they plan making power interruptions at the times of 11, 2, and 7? What if they are others busy doing office jobs or calinderia or watching dramas or schools or whatever you know?

(audience laughing)

Jeremy: This is madness. What are they thinking of?

(audience laughing)

Richard: Well, seems that the DOE cares about the DOE itself rather than the POWERRRR....

(audience laughing)

Richard: Power hungry customers. Man, those electric cars shouldn't deserve a spot here until the near future when power supplies are in normal levels. Also, the DOE is planning about a reserve market and disallowing maintenance work for power plants during the summer holiday and it will provide about 400-600MW. (sigh)

Jeremy: Anyway, while we're in the middle of issue regarding the NSA, what occurs to me that the only thing worse than the whole NSA scandal is...

James: Is what?

Jeremy: Those posts I found on Facebook saying that "Admit It" and then goes "blah blah blah"...Ah pbft....

(audience laughing)

Richard: What do you mean?

Jeremy: Those posts that related on what were doing in the past and present! That's even more annoying than the NSA eavesdropping on us! Let's just say there was some post that goes "If you remember this, your childhood was awesome" with the pics of twirling around a bucket of water, thinking that those tags at the back of our clothes feels like getting sting on the cactus, and then those shows we watched in the past and then those fast forwarding tapes to make it sound like Chip and Dale, and then on and on and on...Those posts feel like eavesdropping to us! Please stop sharing those posts that relate, okay? Knock it off...

(audience laughing)

Richard: Yeah, kindly stop sharing such things!

(audience laughing)

Jeremy: Right, TV5. There will be a new lineup this weekend under the #WeekendDoItBetter tagline and what seems to be interesting that there will be new shows as well as returning ones. So, let's start with the new ones. First off, it's the new gag show called Tropa Moko Unli. The new gag show features Gelli de Belen and Ogie Alcasid, which were from Tropang Trump from the 90's, and then joined by some of the funniest like Edgar Allan Guzman, Empoy, Alwyn Uytingco, Eula Caballero, Ritz Azul, Jasmine Curtis-Smith, and the Artista Academy scholars. It airs on Saturday, September 14. Then, there's Showbiz Police, where hosts Raymond Gutierrez, director Joey Reyes, Lucy Torres-Gomez, and Cristy Fermin, investigates through the hidden world of showbiz controversies. Also on the new lineup was Killer Karaoke which is a bit like that old ABS-CBN show that is called...what's it called?

James: Twist and Shout.

Jeremy: Yes. Twist and Shout, of course. It's where contestants singing while facing numerous obstacles and see if they can survive singing on this new show. New to the lineup was What's Up Doods?. It's kinda more of a late night talk show hosted by Edu Manzano. And last, there's the new show called The Mega and the Song Writer, which is hosted by Sharon Cuneta and Ogie Alcasid. Now onto the returning ones and returning to the new lineup will be a new season of the Philippine version of Who Wants To Be A Millionaire, a new season of Pinoy Explorer, in which Aga Mulach travels around the world in search of surprises hidden around the world, and then, yes. It's our favorite prank show everyone's been watching...It's Wow Mali! This time it's Wow Mali Pa Rin! That's all you can expect on the new #WeekendDoItBetter lineup starting September 14 and 15 and do please support those new and returning shows from TV5.

(cheers and applause)

Jeremy: Now, moving on from here to there because...ahem...Disney Channel is launching two new shows this month. First off and this is a bit of a misunderstanding for us...there's this new cartoon airing on Friday, September 13, and it's called (ahem) Wander Over Yonder.

Richard: What was that? Oh wait! I get it now!

Jeremy: Really?

Richard: Here, let something else explain...(ahem) "LORD HATER, the most evil villain in the universe has used his army of Watchdogs led by COMMANDER PEEPERS to conquer every peace-loving planet in his way! Meanwhile, WANDER (the interstellar fellar who loves being happy and helping others) and his best friend and trusty steed SYLVIA have encountered LORD HATER and his minions!" Yep, that pretty much sums it up but you can expect that on Friday night. Don't forget it before we got zapped by Lord Hater's HATE RAY...

(audience laughing)

Richard: Because on this show...BE HAPPY just like Wander, our newest friend from outer space who loves to give a smile on the face. Oh yeah! There's another new show on Disney Channel and it's on a Sunday night. It's called...(ahem) Liv and Maddie.

Liv and Maddie
(Image: Disney)


James: Uh...yeah. Liv...Maddie...

Richard: That's Liv, the idol twin on the left, and on the right, the athletic twin, that's Maddie. Both played by a newcomer Dove Cameron. That's a new show and it's airing on a Sunday night. Anyway, while Disney gave us a sneak peek on this new show, I felt a bit skeptical but I'm impressed about this new show.

Jeremy: Yeah. I don't care about it but...psst!

Richard: What is it?

Jeremy: (whispering) Don't you think that there's a bit of familiarity here?!

Richard: What do you mean?!

Jeremy: (whispering) Something bothering me that Maddie kinda look like that "majorette nerd" who got zapped by the Brainiacs?

(audience laughing hysterically)

Richard: ??? OH I SEE. Maddie looks like the nerd from a majorette as seen on Brainiac, the nerd who got zapped by those electrical thingy. Yep, for nostalgia's sake but uh oh...

Jeremy: What?

Richard: No time for that, because she kinda look like the majorette nerd that I zapped from Brainiac, gotta run! Bye!

(audience laughing)

How Cute Is Your Character? - Poof


10 cute characters brought in by me will face my CUTENESS TESTS; getting kissed, getting hugged, and against Isabella's cuteness in a bid to top my CUTENESS RANKER leaderboard.

Today's cute character is...

Poof

Is it Poof a fairy god-baby from the hands of Timmy Turner's fairy godparents Cosmo and Wanda from the zany and hilarious TV cartoon The Fairly Odd-Parents as seen on Nickelodeon and made by the studio, I think, that done Adventure Time? Well, actually the studio did this a decade before that but anyway...

Poof is cute for a fairy god-baby...but question is HOW CUTE IS POOF? Sorry C and W, we gonna need Poof for our segment and we're gonna find out if Poof is cuter than BMO in our leaderboard.

First test is...getting kissed. Just how kissable is Poof? Well, the answer, I think, is...Poof smiled! I mean look at Poof, he's so cute when he's laughing happily when we kissed this cute little fairy baby. That is a 9 out of 10 for Poof's "kissable" rating.

Second test is...getting hugged. How huggable is Poof? Once again, that hug made Poof so happy but if you hug him too hard, then you're in a yanking state of calamity right now. Yep, babies cry louder and so is Poof. It might be best to hug him and snuggle him in a gentle kind of way, hoping but not expecting. For his huggable rating, Poof gets an 8 out of 10.

The last test is...against Isabella. Isabella says "Whatcha Doin?"...like this. What would Poof do? Uh-oh... Poof! What are you doing! Stop poofing Izzy! Well, looks like Poof's poofing Izzy right now especially when he thinks he mistaken Isabella for some shiny object. Somebody sedate that Poof. Take him away. Anyway, with all that bonkers going on around here, we tried this thing again and this time, Poof's secured. So, the big moment, how would Poof react to Izzy's cuteness? First 10 seconds, it's fine but later...Whoa...Look at Poof now, he's drooling! He's drooling like a dog! He can't resist himself but then...we give up. Poof's a fairy baby can't be contained. We're giving him a chance so it's a decent 6 out of 10.

Poof from The Fairly Odd-Parents scored a grand total of 23 out of 30. Which means...Poof dethroned Adventure Time's BMO to claim the top spot of our CUTENESS RANKER leaderboard!

1) Poof - 23/30
2) BMO - 22/30
3) Mokona - 22/30
4) Catbug - 20/30
5) Mog - 19/30
6) Adipose - 16/30
7) Pinkie Pie - 15/30

How cute do I rank it? VERY VERY CUTE! HOW CUTE IS YOUR CHARACTER?

F1 2013 Italian GP

F1 2013


After minor setbacks during a race in Monza, Italy, Red Bull Racing's Sebastian Vettel survived to secure his sixth win of the F1 2013 season, needless to say that here in Monza, Force India's facing some major setbacks with Paul di Resta suffered a first-lap casualty after rear-ended Roman Grosjean at the second chicane while Adrian Sutil retired when running behind Lewis Hamilton and Kimi Raikkonen.

PRESS RELEASE:

Race - brilliant Vettel eases to victory in Italy

Red Bull’s Sebastian Vettel survived a number of minor issues to take his sixth win of the season in the Formula 1 Gran Premio d'Italia 2013 at Monza on Sunday afternoon. 

The world champion took the lead at the start as Ferrari’s Felipe Massa sprinted briefly up to second ahead of the second Red Bull of Mark Webber and the second Ferrari of Fernando Alonso. 

As Vettel extended his lead out front, despite some concerns about a flat-spotted tyre, Alonso fought past Webber with a bold move on the third lap, then caught and passed his team mate on the eighth. But there was nothing he could do about the German in the lead and though he finished only 5.4s adrift, the real gap was closer to double that as Vettel eased off considerably.

In the second half of the race Webber fought back and put Alonso under pressure until he was told to start short-shifting, but he was still less than a second behind the Ferrari at the end. Massa was a distant fourth.

Nico Hulkenberg and Mercedes’ Nico Rosberg had a race-long fight for fifth which went the Sauber driver’s way by six-tenths of a second even though Rosberg was the fastest man on track with three laps to go. Daniel Ricciardo made strong use of his superfast-in-a-straight line Toro Rosso to keep Romain Grosjean at bay, but Mercedes' Lewis Hamilton was closing on both and actually passed the Lotus going into the second chicane on the final lap. 

Unfortunately for the Briton, he’d gone over the run-off area to do it and had to hand back the place. Hamilton had his race strategy upset by a slow puncture in his Mercedes’ right front tyre on the 12th lap, and thus had to make two pit stops to almost everybody else’s one.

Kimi Raikkonen was the other man who had to stop twice after sustaining accident damage running his Lotus into Sergio Perez’s McLaren at the first corner after locking up. Like Hamilton, the Finn drove a feisty race to recover, but couldn’t hold Hamilton back on the 49th lap. He did catch and pass Perez, but missed out on the final point when he couldn’t quite get the job done on Jenson Button. The Englishman thus took a solitary point in McLaren’s 50th birthday race.

Behind Perez in 12th, fellow Mexican Esteban Gutierrez brought his Sauber home ahead of the Williams duo of Pastor Maldonado and Valtteri Bottas, while further back Charles Pic beat Caterham team mate Giedo van der Garde, as Jules Bianchi led home Marussia team mate Max Chilton at the rear of the field.

It was a bad race for Force India, with Paul di Resta a first-lap casualty after running into the back of Grosjean at the second chicane - an incident the stewards are investigating - and Adrian Sutil retiring on the penultimate lap when running behind the Hamilton/Raikkonen battle. Jean-Eric Vergne had kept Button and Hamilton at bay in the early stages until a transmission problem on his Toro Rosso put him out on the 15th lap.

Vettel’s sixth win of the season extended his championship lead over Alonso. The German now has 222 points to the Spaniard’s 169, while Hamilton is stuck back on 141 from Raikkonen on 134, as Webber moves up to 130.

In the constructors’ stakes, Red Bull had the biggest day and now have 352 points, while Ferrari’s strong performance puts them back into second place on 248 ahead of Mercedes on 245. Lotus remain fourth on 191 with McLaren fifth on 66 and Force India sixth on 61.

Source: Formula One official

So with Vettel in the lead ahead of Fernando Alonso and Lewis Hamilton, do you think that this 3-time F1 champion still holding back although there are 7 races left in the F1 2013 calendar? There's more to come as the next round of the F1 2013 season takes place at... Singapore this September 22nd.

Sunday, September 8, 2013

Porsche 911 (991) Turbo

2014 Porsche 911 Turbo

First, the 991-spec Porsche 911 brought you the Carrera, then the four-wheel drive 4S, and then the track-focused GT3. Well-governing bodies from Porsche have taken it seriously that the 991-spec Porsche 911 will spawn a Turbo variant with a number of changes around here but before all is told, it's time for me to revisit the gold ol' Executive Optical.

At the Executive Optical, I told my eye doctor to check up my eyes again and then the eye doctor is using everything he had in the name of eye checkups. Farsighted or nearsighted, looks like my eye checkup is done at EO and now let's resume the story.

Anyway, the new 911 Turbo, the ultra-powerful version of the 911 is a quickfire thing Porsche managed to tame this beast with big power while putting the engine in the wrong side of the car. In other words, as what BMO from Adventure Time says, it goes in my butt. Yeah, this is like inserting a VHS tape on BMO's back but anyway, back to the story.

2014 Porsche 911 Turbo speedometer
What can you expect on the brand new 911 Turbo? Well, just like the GT3, the manual gearbox has been dropped out and it was replaced by 7-speed PDK that works brilliantly like what I said on the GT3. Also, the trademark 911 3.8L boxer engine has been given two turbochargers so it churns out about 520HP of power and does 0-100kph in 3.4 seconds but that's just the tip of the iceberg. There's the S model which bumps the 3.8L engine to 560HP of power and a 0-100kph time of 3.1 seconds, that's as mind-numbing as the McLaren MP4-12C, that's for sure.

Be warned, when you face this car against Godzilla, or should I say the Nissan GT-R, it's a do-or-die thing because here's a thing; while the GT-R can do 315 km/h of top speed, the S version of the 911 Turbo can do about 318 km/h of top speed but I don't care about it, it's still the GT-R that will going to rape the 911 Turbo S so hard because of its launch control that...hmmm...does the 911 Turbo S had one?! Well, since Porsche didn't mention anything about it, might as well say that Godzilla raped the 911 Turbo S, he he he...

Darn, referring the fact that the R35 GT-R's more cheaper than the 911 Turbo, be warned though that the pricing starts at around 162,055 Euros so, yet again, Godzilla raped the 911 Turbo. I was gonna say this again and again and again but the producers warned me that I have to explain the exact car only, not explaining the other car. Sorry, Producer-san.

2014 Porsche 911 Turbo interior

Anyway, what about the way it drives? Once again, being a 911, the Turbo version still provides the same 911 chemistry as expected from the past and present; by being a sportscar that has unique styling and spartan driving manners. When I say Spartan, were not talking about King Leonidas kicking someone through the bottomless pit or rather the Halo kind of Spartan. It's the way it behaves and the 911 Turbo, even if it has four-wheel drive, will surely have the good times troll in all walks of life. On the straights, it feels like Brainiacs racing against a bunch of chemicals but thanks to its super-fast PDK shifting and with the turbocharged flat-six engine that delivers a resonating exhaust note, you'll never know what sorts of tricks this car's going to pull on very fast speeds and I have to say, you'd expect your face gets transplanted to the back of your skull. On the corners, it feels as mild and tangy as Azusa Miura wearing Haruka Amami's clothing backstage. Yep, got that whole Million Live feeling around here but oh no. This is much more than that. This is madness to a whole new level and if you want to find some thrills, this is the car for you, despite its high price.

2014 Porsche 911 Turbo


So, verdict time. The 911 Turbo and the S model excels in the pursuit of speed, its spartan driving manners, and hopefully, the will to outrun any exploding microwave alive. One thing I don't like is its high pricing and the theory that this is nothing more of a blunt weapon next to the GT3. Only if you're brave enough to master the raw power of the ultimate 911 as of now.

Photo: Dr. Ing. h.c. F. Porsche AG

Jeep Cherokee KL

The Cherokee is known to be one of the most vital tribes in Native American history whose first known center was in the southern Alleghenies and who presently live in North Carolina and Oklahoma. The Jeep Cherokee, on the other hand, is a legend in the history of Jeep SUVs since its inception in 1974 and for almost four decades, the living legend takes on various forms despite its retirement from the mid-2000's and the advent of the Liberty crossover. Now, with the Liberty already discontinued, Jeep announced that they would bring back the Cherokee name as their newest crossover which uses the underpinnings of the Dodge Dart.

2014 Jeep Cherokee

Despite being a Dodge Dart underneath it (or rather else the Alfa Romeo Giulietta on it), the brand new 2014 Jeep Cherokee is still the legend even though it's now a crossover that slots below its luxurious big brother, the Grand Cherokee. There is now a brand new 2.4L MultiAir Tigershark engine 4-cylinder engine as seen on the Dodge Dart as well. The new engine on the new Cherokee develops 184HP of power and 171lb-ft of torque and it's mated with the brand new 9-speed automatic transmission which helps the new Cherokee to attain 31 HWY MPG of fuel economy and at one tank, it can do about 490 hwy miles. Not bad though, not bad. Putting a small engine on an offroader sounds a bit of an off-topic but when you want more, there's an optional 3.2L Pentastar V6 engine which develops 271HP of power, and 239lb-ft of torque.

With the new V6 engine that is more powerful than the old V6 engine and when equipped with the Trailer Tow Group, it provides the best-in-class towing capacity of up to four and a half tons, which makes it...just another one of the crossovers suitable for caravanners going out for a holiday and since Summer's almost over and fall starts, might as well keep it for next summer but in case of day offs, the brand new Cherokee's worth the wait to have your weekends covered.

2014 Jeep Cherokee
The standard Cherokee is front-wheel drive, much like any other crossovers you know, but unlike any other, it can be offered with an optional 4WD powertrain and if you're opted for the more off-road focused Trailhawk model with the standard Active Drive Lock 4x4 system with 4-Low and rear locker, it behaves just like the big boys. You can get muddy and dirty with this one and that's more like it. In today's history, most of the SUVs have gone the way of becoming luxurious coaches. Range Rovers, Land Cruisers, Suburbans, they maybe off-roaders by their appearance but they're not comfortable at doing it. This new Cherokee isn't. It has all of the right gadgets and all of the right chemistry that makes this crossover well-honed in the tough off-road world. It doesn't feel like you're walking on thin air but more importantly, it feels like you're walking on custard. Talk about science but remember the good old custard rule; never stop.

The brand new Cherokee is worth a tough mudder's dream come true because it retains its TRAIL RATED attitude that most Jeeps had but I'm afraid that there is a downfall to the revived legend and let me explain what I'm on about...

2014 Jeep Cherokee
Chrysler promised the enthusiasts that the new Cherokee will have a much modern design but for you, me, and everyone else in the world, look at this mess. I just don't like the way Chrysler designed the front view of the new Cherokee and look at these slanted headlamps, this is as hideous as the bad piggies from Angry Birds but more importantly, this is the kind of crossover you REALLY don't want if you have kids five and under because if it does, it will make kids crying about there's a monster in the house, even at nighttime. If you had kids, you may probably not want to have this on your next camping trip or see someone having this because kids might think there's a giant bulborb waiting to eat them. Bulborb, eh? That's Pikmin stuff but yes, the new Cherokee is as scary to look as the monsters from Pikmin, particularly the Bulborbs, the Snagrets, the Blowhog variations, the Mamuta, the Smoky Pogg, you name the rest of the monsters that the Pikmin face against.

Why, oh Why? This new design really is like the equivalent of several enemies from Pikmin and it seems that my feet's starting to feel the frills right now because that thing made me as nervous as someone working from 9 to 5. And then there's another downside. When you drive this on the normal roads, this is as catastrophic as dropping a refrigerator from stairs in case you are dismantling your own bro cave. Also, if you drive one of these in, let's just say, at a children's party, or at the country club, the hospital, the shopping mall, or any points of interest, it's not pretty to look and feel at because when bystanders looking at it, they would rather just panicked right now because they might think one of the monsters from a video game came out to eat them.

2014 Jeep Cherokee interior
Happily however, if you ignore the exterior design and the jump on the interior, it's worth redeeming. You can have a sat-nav, a personalized instrumental cluster, buttons at the steering wheel, and if you wait long enough when this year's fall TV shows taking a break before coming back next February, you can have a special wireless charging pad that lets you charge your gadgets without the wires. That is worth the conventional one and while the tech savvy Cherokee provides more than that, there are 70 available Safety & Security features such as the new Parallel and Perpendicular Park Assist, ParkSense front / rear Park Assist, Blind Spot Monitoring and Cross Path Detection, standard 10 airbags with standard full-length side-curtain & side thorax airbags, new LaneSense Lane Departure Warning, and new Adaptive Cruise Control with Stop and Go. See? Maybe the new 2014 Cherokee, despite its ugly looks, is redeeming after all.

So...what's good about the new Cherokee? It's the gizmos, the new engines, the offroad capability inherited from most Jeeps, and best of all the pricing. With prices start at 22,995 Dollars for the Sport model up to 29,495 Dollars for the Trailhawk model, that makes it great value. What's bad is the design that looks like the enemies from Pikim, the 9-speed gearbox's too much, and it's not pretty to drive on the streets.

Available colors: Brilliant Black, Deep Cherry Red, Bright White, True Blue, Billet Silver, Anvil, Granite, Eco Green, Mango Tango, and Cashmere.

Photo: Chrysler Group, LLC.

Saturday, September 7, 2013

Let's Do The News! (September 7, 2013)

James: And now, the news and oh! I heard Rolls-Royce will be showcasing a concept car of some sort and some say, it's going to be based on the Phantom Executive Wheelbase. Here it is...

Revealed: Rolls-Royce Celestial concept
Rolls-Royce Phantom Executive Wheelbase Celestial concept

Richard: Wha...looks the same but what sort of concept was that?

James: Says here it's called the Celestial concept and this concept is a sheer sign how bespoke the craftsmen from Rolls-Royce are capable of. The Phantom Celestial concept was design following the "nighttime" theme on it and when you get inside...

Revealed: Rolls-Royce Celestial concept
Rolls-Royce Phantom Executive Wheelbase Celestial concept

(ooohh)

Jeremy: Hold it...That looks rather magnificent for a car like this because what I think of it is a Rolls-Royce Phantom made for the stargazing in mind and what bothers me that if this car had a telescope on it, I wouldn't mind saying, (mockingly) "Hey chaps! Let's look at the stars in my Rolls-Royce!"

(audience laughing)

James: More like...show me the stars. You know, it's hard to find stars on a mostly cloudy night but I think there's another way to see some stars in this kind of climate.

Jeremy: Like what?

(POW!)

(audience laughing)

Richard: Ow! What for?

James: Here you go, punching someone else's face. Another thing you can find some stars.

(audience laughing)

Richard: Knock it off, okay? Would you want me to show you the stars?!

(audience laughing)

Jeremy: Guys...guys...enough about that and let's move on to more serious news. If I said serious, I mean, of course, some (bleep) news coming out from the block.

(audience laughing)

James: Uh...why the long face?

Jeremy: You see there was the news that the the boffins from the NSA inserted backdoors in various forms of encryption and they said it was promised...wait for it....wait for it...wait for it...to spy on everyone around the world.

(huh?)

Richard: I'm sorry, what was that? Snooping or eavesdropping on our activities?!!

Jeremy: That's not all, reports just said that the NSA and its British equivalent unlock encryption programs that EVERYONE uses. If it says EVERYONE, the reports do mean it, just as Edward Snowden prophesied.

(audience laughing)

Richard: Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! Slow down, Jeremy! Slow down? What do you mean that the whole thing that Edward Snowden leaked is nothing more than a prophecy that is waiting to be fulfilled by the NSA in terms of destroying America's privacy? I was quite scared by this one but...

Jeremy: Anyway, based on the reports I found on the internet, those secret programs codenamed "Bullrun" or "Edgehill" from Britain's GCHQ took three years spent at least three years trying to crack into protected traffic of the most popular Internet companies, mainly Google, Yahoo, Facebook and Microsoft’s Hotmail.

(ominous voice: The Bells of St. John are ringing...The Bells of St. John are ringing...The Bells of St. John are ringing...)

Richard: Uh...what do they mean...The Bells of St. John are ringing?

Jeremy: Yes. The Bells of St. John are ringing...not just us but on everyone. This whole NSA scandals...it really is the sign that The Bells of St. John are ringing or for worse...well, I was gonna add the whole Metal Gear references here.

James: The PATRIOTS?!

(audience laughing)

Jeremy: Yes. The PATRIOTS. That's the Metal Gear reference I was trying to say. Be warned, change your password, delete your internet history, delete all the cookies, logout after using, and better yet...

Richard: STAY OUT FROM YOUR GADGETS!!!

(audience laughing)

Jeremy: Anyway, moving on to the Syria crisis because I've been bothered about something from the G20 Summit at Russia, even for the US president who says that he will speak to the American people about why the US need to take military force against Syria. Besides, we have to wait until his upcoming speech from the White House next week, regarding about waiting for Congress and the public's response on the military action versus the Syrian government.

James: Well, I am quite bothered by this and guess what? There's more tensions into this and be warned, by the time we're mentioning this, I'm afraid that you'll becoming sleepless because of the tensions.

Jeremy: What was that?

James: Well, sorry, I can't mention that because if I said that, everyone will be sleepless by the time they go to bed tonight.

(audience laughing)

Jeremy: Come on, what is it?

James: No. I don't want to mention this.

Richard: Well, say it!

James: No way. I am not going to mention this.

Richard: SAY IT!!!

James: All right! All right! I'll mention this...and sorry for everyone around here for being restless on your way to bed tonight.

(audience laughing)

James: A report from CBS says that a senator from South Carolina warned that "Nukes In Hands Of Terrorists Could Result In Bomb Coming To Charleston Harbor". This senator says that if America don't response, Iran, which is a rogue state, will not believe America's resolve to block Iran from making nukes and if it fell from the wrong hands will spell doomsday at the Charleston Harbor.

Richard: Well that was one painful warning to South Carolinians.

Jeremy: Yeah. That's a painful one and if it does, I think it will leave a massive crater at the top of the world.

(audience laughing)

Jeremy: You guys don't see Adventure Time, don't you? There was this whole Graybles episode and then the storyteller's babbling about this episode.

Richard: Uh...would you mind?!

(audience laughing)

Jeremy: Anyway, forget about that, moving on to this because the International Olympic Committee are on the meeting about which city will pass the torch after the 2016 Rio Olympics and as of now, three candidates are on the bidding table; Tokyo, Madrid, and now...Istanbul.

James: Istanbul on the bidding table for the 2020 Olympics?! Well, in my theory that if it does became, it will be another one of the emerging nation to take part of the Olympics but Tokyo, Japan...seems to be a decent candidate but with all that issues going on about the leakage of contaminated water from the Fukushima Daiichi nuclear power plant, I don't think Tokyo's going to be a proper candidate for the 2020 Olympics. That's my point but choosing which city will host the next Olympics is a hard task to do...

Jeremy: Well, you're right. I think Tokyo may not be a proper candidate for this considering the strong yen rate, the economic climate, and the whole Fukushima crisis thing that has been around since the 3.11.11 disaster. What's amusing here that the host city will be announced later and around 100 IOC members will vote after the presentations. So um...what's it gonna be?

(audience murmuring)

Jeremy: Well, I hear Istanbul or Madrid but no sign of Tokyo here...

(audience laughing)

Jeremy: Anyway, Renault announced a new version of the current generation Megane, more like Phase II of the third-generation Megane. Here it is...

2014 Renault Megane range
Jeremy: On sale early next year, to be revealed at this year's Frankfurt Motor Show, and it has Renault's new signature front face as seen on the Twingo and the Clio.

Richard: Well, that looks convincing but sadly, feels like I don't like the new front face because it looks a bit too...convincing...

(audience laughing)

Jeremy: Now, as we know, Jaguar makes sedans and coupes while Land Rover makes SUVs. What I didn't notice that Jaguar is on the SUV scene now thanks to this...

Jaguar C-X17
(audience laughing)

Jeremy: This is the concept version of what if Jaguar make an SUV. It's called the C-X17 and as of now, no further details from now but what seems to be misleading because like I said, Jaguar makes sedans and coupes, not to mention a station wagon in the form of the XF Sportbrake but...this sparked a question: does Jaguar ever need an SUV?

Richard: Well, it's a big no for me because well, leave it to Land Rover and Range Rover because SUV is their speciality.

James: Uh...me too. Jaguar doesn't need this because Land Rover has them covered. If they made this, I think it will hurt sales of both Land Rover and Range Rover because...it's an SUV. Why would Jaguar want to make one?

(audience laughing)

Jeremy: Anyway, that is the end of the news and we'll leave you with another one of Bravest Warriors short titled Impossibomb. Yes. This is the fourth out of the five BW shorts before it all leads to a new season to this web cartoon coming this fall in http://cartoonhangover.com/



Richard: Oh yeah, before that, some big news for BW fans because on Saturday, September 7, at the Meltdown, Sunset Blvd., LA, there's going to be a special event just for the fans of Bravest Warriors. Numerous BOOM! Comics' artists, including Hannah Nance Partlow, will be there to draw something for the fans and oh! By 3:00PM to 4:00PM, there will be signing of autographs by the little kid who voiced the fan-favorite Catbug, Sam Lavagnino.

James: Be sure to come at the Meltdown, BW fans in LA because this is a sweet treat. Anyway, here's Minisode 4 of Bravest Warriors titled Impossibomb.

Karylle, IHAW NA!

Karylle is the guest of the day at Septemer 6 2013's Banana Nite's IHAW NA segment. Due to the fact that her real name is so darn long, it can't fit her twitter handle name, Karylle tries to succeed from Zsa Zsa Padilla, and strives herself as a singer. She was appeared in The Kitchen Musical.

Meanwhile in TNT: Tapatan Ni Tunting, Tunting (Ryan Bang) is on a face-off interview with a Nicki Minaj wannabe. Nicki's too fast to talk...

MG MG3

2014 MG MG3

Would you look at that, this is just another one of the ugly cars to come out this year and before you can say "kill it before it lays eggs", let's introduce to the weird-looking supermini that some say it's Britain's answer to the Dacia Sandero, Ford Fiesta, Kia Pride, Mazda Demio, and the Skoda Fabia, in case you're wandering.

It's called the MG3 and although this car maybe a brand new model, it's not new to us because this car's on sale on the People's Republic of China two years ago. Of course, the Chinese version of Top Gear do had a spin on one of these Chinese-British superminis. Talk about dual citizenship here but for this new model, like the MG6 GT and Magnette sedan, it's produced somewhere at Longbridge, which was in Birmingham if you look at the map.

2014 MG MG3
Just one question; how did it came here? Well, don't ask me, ask the folks from MG Motor UK because some say, they wanted to make a low-cost compact car that claims to be "Made in Britain, Sold in Britain" and tries to compete cheap cars made from, let's just say, South Korea or Japan or Romania or India or any other emerging countries you may know.

For the new MG3, I might say that if you drove one of these, people are thinking you came from a retirement home going out at the thrift store and then buy some stuff and then went back home, without realizing that you are labeled as a "hoarder" because of so many stuff inside your house, so much that your grandkids can't get through. Oh geez... If you're a youngster who just got a learner's permit, what can I say? This is rather an unpleasant one, more unpleasant than the prehistoric Daewoo Matiz, perhaps. Hmmm...

2014 MG MG3 interior

2014 MG MG3 interior


I was quite puzzled to see such thing existed because judging by its appearance, it feels a bit "Made in China" especially for a car that was "Made in Britain, Sold in Britain". However, there's a catch, although it maybe not as youth-oriented as it seems, more like another one of the cars your lolo and lola might drive, the starter price is £8,399 or about 581,000 Php, making it one of the cheapest cars available in the UK so that makes it good value on par against its rivals. Standard features include electric windows, stereo, USB connectivity, stability control, hill hold control, tire pressure monitor, daytime running lights, halogen headlamps, and immobiliser. Hmmm, not bad though, not bad, with the list of standard features as well as the fact that it has MP3 connectivity and USB connectivity, that sounds more fun if you're a fashionista going out to the mall listening to too much pop music on the radio. However, for more expensive versions, ranging from 9,299 GBP up to 9,999 GBP, you can have digital radio, Bluetooth, easy electronic air conditioning, and so much gadgetry added to this sub-10,000 pound supermini.

Gee, that sounds acceptable but sadly, the seats are a bit cheap as well as the seat support that should have made it better. What it feels like is like the same feeling you'd expect from a "banger" car from the 90's. Yes, this car's got the 90's feelings when it comes to interior comfort or perhaps, more like seating in the house of an informal settler. It's a good thing it's not like an "informal settler" on wheels but sadly, it feels like...visiting to a house with a very dirty restroom on it. Eeeww... Sadly, if you're as big as mine, I think this is not the best choice of the job because the room's seem to be too small for you and the seating's a bit too low for your back, making it too difficult to get in and get out on a height of yours.

And then there's the way it drives and what can I say? It's not quite bad in terms of handling but still, it feels a bit heavy for a small car and the 1.5L MPi DOHC VTI-Tech engine that develops 106HP of power feels a bit like, what the Earl of Lemongrab might say it, UNACCEPTABLE! I agree on what the folks are saying that the 1.5L petrol engine feels too big for a small car, especially when it was mated with an old-school 5-speed manual gearbox. 0-60mph takes about ten and a half seconds, and top speed, it can do about 108mph or about 174kph.

Of course, being a cheap car, the suspension's rather firm rather than being too classy or more European like the Audi A1, the Citroen DS3, the Renault Twingo, or the Fiat 500 but sadly, it behaves like Asian compacts so it feels a bit jittering and as uncomfortable as a cheap van we've rented on our long trip during a typhoon making havoc last month and if I was on that situation where I'm taking this on the British motorways, I would be scared by this one because for being such a small car, it's worth the risk driving this one on the motorways until you smell some fear coming out from your car. Frenetic, isn't it?

So, what's the good thing about driving the MG3? The pricing, the standard features that will keep you occupied for hours, and it's worth the shot of being a city car. Bad things? Well, it handles like hell, the personalization is a bit lame, the engine's too big for a small car, the suspension's poor, and overall, the design is a bit too unfriendly for me.

Available colors: Red Rose, White on the Tiles, Stuck on Blue, Newton Black, Smokey Blues, Silver Fox, Orange Marmalade, Hello Yellow, Cherry Bomb, and Lady Gray.

Photo: MG Motor UK

Cars GT6 Should Put (Volume 8)



Everyone knows that more and more car gamers everywhere are willing to prefer the upcoming Gran Turismo 6, coming this winter exclusively on the Playstation3 console, than the upcoming Forza Motorsport 5, coming this autumn exclusively on the new XBOX One console. However, despite the 1200-car lineup, there are some cars GT6 should put...

Cars like...

1) Ford F-150 SVT Raptor '10

WHY: The SVT-improved version of the F-150 truck, called the Raptor, is every off-roader's favorite and I do hope this high-performance truck will be featured on this game. If it does, it acts beautifully on dirt and snow courses.

2) Ferrari FF '11

WHY: This is the first ever Ferrari that has four seats and a very clever four wheel drive system that acts differently unlike any other 4WD cars ever driven. This should add some interesting twists on GT6 once this eccentric creation was featured so do please make it happen.

3) Chevrolet Camaro ZL1 '12

WHY: The ZL1 is the performance-oriented version of the Camaro which has a very powerful V8 engine combined with wide-range of gizmos that makes it a track-focused muscle car that was once honed at the Nurburgring. This should make a perfect rival to the 2013 Shelby GT500 if this car appears on GT6. Of course, with the 2013MY GT500 coming on GT6, I hope the ZL1 should come just for the sake of rivalry.

4) Shelby GT500 '67

WHY: The classic GT500 muscle car became famous for its appearance in the car heist movie "Gone in 60 Seconds" starring Nicholas Cage. Come on, we're a bunch of movie buffs here so do please feature Eleanor on GT6 because...WE KINDLY DO MEAN IT so please "Go Baby Go".

5) Lexus GS350 F-Sport '12

WHY: The latest Lexus GS is the first to incorporate Lexus' signature spindle grille and I sure hope this model should have a spot in the GT6 car list but what I was hoping for is the one with the F-Sport trim. When added, I just want to compare this to its Toyota Aristo predecessor.


The results please? So, if Polyphony's still on the rethinking process whether these cars I've mentioned will be featured on Gran Turismo 6, whether in game or as a DLC, you can't say that I didn't had a bit to do with that.

Take that to Kaz Yamauchi!

Threats from North Korea - A Week in Review (September 7, 2013)


And now, the week in review of what's what at the Korean peninsula...

September 2, 2013

- The two Koreas are currently holding the first meeting of the joint committee that will be the charge of ensuring the resumption of the shuttered Kaesong complex.

- China's top nuclear envoy, Wu Dawei has discussed reopening of the ling-stalled six-party talks with North Korea.

September 3, 2013

- Despite a marathon of talks over the resumption of the Kaesong complex, the two Koreas are in limbo.

- With clues that North Korea will be re-engaging in dialogue with regional neighbors, experts worldwide are bullish on the possible resumption of the stalled six-party talks.

September 4, 2013

- The nation's spy agency arrested a leftist lawmaker on charges of plotting to overthrow the government, putting it closer to launching a prosecution probe into the scandal.

- SoKor president Park Geun-hye embarked on an 8-day visit to Russia and Vietnam.

September 5, 2013

- North and South Korea agreed to reconnect the military hotline that has been disconnected since March amid heightened tensions.

September 6, 2013

- President Park Geun Hye addressed the issue of "high unemployment and unbalanced growth" in a lead speech during the second session of the G20 Leaders' Summit.

- US President Barack Obama and Japanese PM Shinzo Abe were united as they expressed mounting concerns about North Korea's nuclear program.

"Simumot"

On the September 6, 2013 episode of Bubble Gang...

- "Sino ka?" Bubble Gags

- Mommy knows what you're instagram-ing at...

- The Adventures of Ruffa Mae Kwento in...Crime Scene

- Guess who's late for the meeting?

- Mr. Assimo in the middle of job interview...

- Bubble Gang does "Chik'n skin ni Mang Juan" by spoofing this commercial as "CHIK'N SKIN NI MANG JOHN". Packed with Sarap ng Pinoy!

- Mommy knows what you're twitting at...

- Special report about Sec. De Anim!!! This is going to be a dramatic one!

- Brod Pete and pals are answering life's hardest questions in ANG BAGONG DATING DOON!

- The Adventures of Ruffa Mae Kwento in...the emergency room!

- Tata Lino is once again helping everyone with some quotes!

- Moymoy Palaboy and Roadfill does Mundo Mo'y Akin in...MUNDO MOYMOY AKIN!

Friday, September 6, 2013

KZ Tandingan, IHAW NA!

For the September 5, 2013 of Banana Nite, X Factor Philippines winner KZ Tandingan was the guest on the IHAW NA segment. Having won The X Factor Philippines and became a singing sensation, KZ's talents really did help her family from Davao. The songs she used on her audition was Ready or Not and Over the Rainbow and most of her songs she used really made a "standing ovation". When she was in high school, she suffered problems from her vocal cords.

Meanwhile on BISTODO (the BISTADO spoof), Julius Baba (Zanjoe Marudo) investigates illegal recruitment and as it turned out, the victim of illegal recruitment, IS an illegal recruiter herself!